Sunday Schooled - My father is now my ancestor

3 years ago ! Ashee, ashee, ashee. For three years the memory of my father, and his crossing the bar into ancestor-ship brought pains to my stomach, tension in my voice, and very often uncontrollable tears.
Today I rejoice that he is home, or closer to his home in Glory.... Tears, pains, and all. May the almighty be praised. May my father's memory and legacy continue to be a blessing. May his 'ancestorship' remain a blessing. May my mother's heart heal. As Luther said...... "Dear Lord she dying, to dance with my father again." - Seko Varner 09/22/2012

'Sunday Schooled' is a collection of blog posts from Seko Varner's former blogs. This original post is dated 09/25/2009 a few days after Seko's father died. Originally posted here: http://drivingmrdaddy.blogspot.com/2009/09/my-father-is-now-my-ancestor.html   

Dr. Rev. Samuel Lee Varner: Sunrise 10/19/1937. 
Sunset 09/22/2009.
9.22.2009 I was awoken suddenly at 1:37 a.m. I couldn't determine what awoke me. I couldn't immediately return to sleep. 10 minutes or so later I was snoring. At 1:51 a.m. I'm awakened by a phone call. I hear my mother's muffled voice crying hysterically. My sister in-law then appears on the line saying "Seko, Papi's gone. He's gone."

I couldn't breathe......... "Are you saying that he's dead ? Is that what you're saying ?" hoping that Dad was moved to another room in the Rehab' Center. Life nudged me and I fought back throwing the telephone receiver at the mirror shocking my wife awake. "What, what is it Seko ?" I couldn't answer........Too busy screaming.......Too busy crying.....I wanted to break everything in sight. I ran out of the room yelling and grabbed a lamp on the way out hurling it towards the window. Rhonda's trying to calm me down while I run down the stairs and out of the house screaming. "Don't drive, don't get in the car" she begged as I ran down the streets of my neighborhood. I had to get somewhere where I couldn't break anything else. Finally I fell to my knees on a patch of grass near the main street. After a while I sobbingly returned to my house, dried my eyes, and gathered myself........ Until I looked into the worried face of my 7 year old daughter. The look on her face weakened me as I fell to the floor crying and trying to catch my breath. I couldn't look at my son, I didn't want to make eye contact with him as I couldn't be a strong supportive father at this moment in time. I hated that he saw me completely floored and unable to control myself. I tried to breathe to calm myself but I couldn't. I felt as if I lost the reason to breathe.






Eight hours ago I returned from an anniversary trip to New Orleans with my wife of twelve years. I planned to see Dad as soon as I returned, but became wrapped up in seeing a few counseling client's instead thinking that I'd be able to see Dad tomorrow. Tomorrow never came, tomorrow will never come. Enroute to the nursing home to hold the lifeless hand of my father I sent the text: "My father is now my ancestor."

Seko Benjamin-Eric Varner, 09/22/2009
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Seko Varner is from Positive Vibes Financial, a World Financial Group team of financial services agents. They specialize in debt reduction, investments, and insurances. Seko is in high demand as a special events DJ and owns an event marketing service. Seko has diverse background in business, counseling and education. He has been real estate agent, a school counselor, a teacher, and an Intensive In-Home Counselor. Seko is active with numerous Youth Mentorship programs and has a background in radio and television. Visit www.HappilyEverAfter.Be or call 757-248-3820 for more details.