Showing posts with label Lessons Learned. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Lessons Learned. Show all posts

Monday, February 16, 2015

I'd rather do it myself (another step towards failure)

"If you're up against a problem, meet it squarely face to face........"

     One of the things I've noticed with many of my intensive in-home counseling clientele is the propensity of many parents, particularly single mothers, to allow their children, primarily sons, to avoid things that they are not particularly talented at. In many cases these parents will do household chores for the boys stating "If I let him do it, I'll have to do it all over again. He does a horrible job. Id rather do it myself."

     Interestingly enough these same parents will then complain that the child is irresponsible. To many times the old adage "Mothers love their sons, and raise their daughters." rings true. The suggestion that these parents compel these sons to complete the chore and to teach them how to meet a standard is often met with resistance. Teaching them to walk by extending your hands in front of the infant, and baby-talking with them to teach them to walk was adorable and fun, but teaching them to be responsible seems like pulling teeth.

     If you want your child to be responsible, you have to give him responsibility and guide him while he moves from under-performance to satisfactory performance, to enable him to become responsible. "I've told him a thousand times..." is normally expressed by these parents. Explaining, discussions, nagging, yelling, or subtle hints normally doesn't work. Meet the problem squarely face to face with action, not with words. The opposite option normally leads your son another step towards failure.

SV
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     If you have consumer debt, and you'd like to reduce the interest rate, and the amount owed, give me a text or a call @ 757-932-0177. Seko Varner is from Positive Vibes Inc. This company combines entertainment, counseling, community activism, financial literacy and debt reduction counseling.
     Seko is also in high demand as a special events DJ and owns an event marketing service. Seko has diverse background in business, financial services, real estate, radio, counseling and education (WHEW). Visit www.HappilyEverAfter.Be or call 757-932-0177 for more details. At the time of this posting Seko is not active with World Financial Group, nor with financial services marketing.

Monday, March 4, 2013

Guest post - Feelin’ Some Kinda Way About Fear

Feelin’ Some Kinda Way ~ About Fear, Insecurity & The Bubbleguts

One morning I awoke to fear. I didn’t immediately know what I was afraid of; I just opened my eyes to this quiet sense that I was troubled, worried, something’s just not right in my world this morning – at 4am. I promised God and myself some time ago that I wasn’t going to complain when I had these 4am wakeups. Whatever the feeling I have when waking during this time, I’m convinced that God has something to say. The question is whether I plan to talk, listen, or write.

I talked, listened, and wrote.
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This is a guest post by AngelinaD. The original post can be found here:
http://angelinad.wordpress.com/2012/05/09/feelin-some-kinda-way-about-fear-insecurity-the-bubbleguts/
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Fears often come to us in the form of people, places, things, events, tasks, etc. It’s the fear of ________. You can easily define what fits in the blank. But, I have come to understand that when I cannot define fear, it’s because I’m not really afraid. I no longer carry the spirit of fear. I, like you, must face things of this world, but I am not afraid anymore because I KNOW that God has my back. Whatever the outcome of whatever I undertake or whatever is thrown at me, I am going to be ok. I’m not troubled by fear. We don’t need to be afraid.

But, it’s 4am. My day is not ready to start, and I thought I awoke to fear. So, I began to ask, “What is it that I’m feeling…Help me see what’s troubling me…” and in an instant, the bubbleguts tell me immediately that I’m dealing with – insecurity.

in·se·cu·ri·ty – a feeling of apprehensiveness and uncertainty; a lack of assurance.
I had replaced fear with a lack of faith – in faith. And now, I’m waking to doubt. We only need a mustard seed of faith to be assured of salvation; and yet, I awoke with my stomach in knots because I wanted, needed assurance that I was hearing from Him. I already had assurance. I was certain of that. But, I needed confirmation.

What an uncomfortable feeling! To awake to physical discomfort rooted in seeds that I allowed to be planted. Headed to the facilities, I became more overwhelmed with self-doubt. I wondered on some current events and situations and looked for a cause rooted in me. I began to replay my actions. Did I make a misstep? Did I do something I wasn’t supposed to do? But why would I doubt me when the things I do are not for me? In the facilities, I released – waste. Waste that formed in my bowels as the result of something I ingested {ate, heard, saw}. The stench of defecated process re~assured me.

My eyesight adjusted to the darkness of the room, and I could see all that was around me – now – everything is in its place. And, I heard – “It is for ME.”

And then, I flushed.

Assurance is Confirmation.

May you experience the bubbleguts.
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Seko Varner is from Positive Vibes Financial, a World Financial Group team of financial services agents. They specialize in debt reduction, investments, and insurances. Seko is also in high demand as a special events DJ and owns an event marketing service. Seko has diverse background in business, real estate, counseling and education. Seko is active with numerous Youth Mentorship programs and has a background in radio and television. Visit www.HappilyEverAfter.Be or call 757-248-3820 for more details.

Tuesday, February 26, 2013

Family of 4 shows the way to Financial FREEdom

This is one of the best examples of living for the future. America, we can get out of debt !
Don't believe me just watch:
Seko
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The original post is here:
http://finance.yahoo.com/news/how-a-family-of-four-manages-to-live-well-on-just--14-000-per-year-174803218.html

How a Family of Four Manages to Live Well on Just $14,000 Per Year

In the years since the recession, the median household income in the U.S. has dropped to just over $50,000, while fixed costs like health care, higher education, and housing have only soared. Now imagine trying to support a family of four on a fraction of that income.

It's a reality that stay-at-home wife and mother of two Danielle Wagasky has lived for the last four years. And, perhaps a little surprisingly, she wouldn't have it any other way.

Wagasky, 28, lives with her her husband, Jason, 31, and their two young children in a three-bedroom family home in Las Vegas, Nevada. While Jason, a member of the U.S. Army, completes his undergraduate studies, the family's only source of income is the $14,000 annual cost of living allowance he receives under the G.I. Bill. Despite all odds, the family has barely any credit card debt, no car payment, and no mortgage to speak of.

Wagasky has been sharing her journey to living meaningfully and frugally on her blog, Blissful and Domestic, since 2009.

She was kind enough to chat with BI and tell us how she makes it work.

Wagasky finds inspiration everywhere from the library to tips from readers on her blog.

Amazon "My husband told me he'd heard about this book, [America's Cheapest Family Gets You Right on the Money]," she said. "We talked about it over the phone and I read it and thought how it could apply to us."

The couple had a single savings goal in mind –– scraping together $30,000 for a down-payment on their home in their native Henderson, Nevada.

The mindless spending was out, and Wagasky came up with a budget she could make work. "I changed the way I was grocery shopping and started working my way up, " she said.

She stopped eating out and learned how to cook.

Wagasky barely knew her way around a kitchen when she started her money makeover.

Now she's an avid cookbook collector (she checks them out from libraries or asks for them as gifts to save), and it's one of the simplest ways she's managed to cutback on spending.

With a $7 bread-maker she scored at a local thrift shop, she never spends on store bought slices. She's not shy about professing her love for wholesale stores like Costco, which is her go-to source for baking ingredients.

Everything in the home is either hand-sewn and or made from scratch.

seth w./Flickr"Everything must be budgeted," Wagasky wrote in a June entry on her blog. "From family outings, to toiletries to clothes purchases. It must be budgeted."

And she takes Do-It-Yourself to the extreme. Everything from laundry soap and clothing to the kitchen her husband installed in their new home was either crafted by hand or thrifted.

She swears by this home-made laundry detergent recipe.

The family swapped cable for Netflix and Hulu.

When it come to cutting costs, cable was as easy luxury to part ways with.

With two children aged 6 and 8 to entertain, Wagasky invests $14.99 in a Netflix plan and recently added Hulu to the mix.

The family also uses a simple antennae to pick up basic cable channels.

She goes to the grocery store once per month, pays cash, and never goes over budget.

REUTERS/Mario AnzuoniWith a single source of fixed income, there's no room for impulse purchases in the Wagasky household.

They budget $400 for groceries each month and that's it.

"Once that $400 is gone, it is gone," she writes. "There are no extra shopping trips made because there is no more money."

They are a cash-only household but keep a credit card for emergencies.

Wagasky said they have no credit debt, but they do charge emergency expenses on plastic when absolutely necessary.

"We recently had some medical bills we had to pay, and we were able to take our savings and pay those down as fast as we could," she said.

They fill up their tanks once per month and combine errands as much as possible.

REUTERS/Pichi ChuangWith gas prices creeping higher each all the time, the Wagaskys watch their mileage like hawks.

That means combining errands together and doing all they can to make one tank of gas last a month.

"We know we don't get to drive and visit family often, so when we do we cherish it," she wrote in a blog entry.

"We don't go just for an hour, we stay and visit and even run errands that may be close to where we have family. We try to remember that when the gas is gone...it is gone."

They paid for both of their cars in cash and have no car payments.

After Wagasky's husband left active duty and started school, the couple knew they would only have $14,000 per year to live on.

So they paid off the $8,000 he owed on his truck while he was earning more and they could afford the expense.

They also bought a van, which they saved $10,000 for initially and were able to pay the remaining $12,000 owed within a year.

Having zero car payments is a nice relief.

She skips all kiddie snacks in favor of healthier, cheaper DIY options.

AP Photo/Brennan LinsleyLike anyone with simple math skills, Wagasky was quick to realize how much cash she was wasting on prepackaged snacks for her children.

She cut them out completely and whips up homemade granola bars and trail mix instead.

If she can freeze food, she will.

If you're on a tight food budget, your freezer will become your best friend.

Wagasky chops vegetables and fruits and freezes them for a month. She actually does the same for dairy products like cheese, butter and yogurt.

"I am able to freeze about 8 gallons of milk each month," she writes. "They sit at the bottom of my freezer and we thaw them out when we need them." Baked goods get the same chilly treatment.

She uses a food co-op to save on fresh produce.

REUTERS/Mario AnzuoniWagasky was dubious about joining a food co-op, but after three months, she realized she would never beat the savings or quality she found.

Food co-ops pool membership fees together in order to fund a monthly harvest that's distributed at designated pick-up points.

A couple of times per month, Wagasky gets a basketful of in-season produce for $15 –– way better bargain than she'd ever find in stores.

They took advantage of Nevada's declining housing market to score a cheap foreclosure.

By the time Wagasky's husband came home from Iraq, they had managed to scrape together the $30,000 they needed for a downpayment on a home.

"But we decided the best option would be not to have a mortgage payment at all," she said. "We found a fixer-upper that didn't have a kitchen ... and we paid cash."

Price tag: $28,000. With the leftover cash, they were able to finish the kitchen and install wood flooring throughout the house.


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Seko Varner is from Positive Vibes Financial, a World Financial Group team of financial services agents. They specialize in debt reduction, investments, and insurances. Seko is also in high demand as a special events DJ and owns an event marketing service. Seko has diverse background in business, real estate, counseling and education. Seko is active with numerous Youth Mentorship programs and has a background in radio and television. Visit www.HappilyEverAfter.Be or call 757-248-3820 for more details.

Sunday, February 24, 2013

The Plan is coming..... I hope you are coming too !

'The Plan is coming'..... I hope you are coming too !
O.K. This is 'The Plan' week, which is title of Positive Vibes Financial first event. We will be hosting an event once a quarter with a Service-Services model. In short we will host an event which we will do as a service to the community in a way that also provides a glimpse on our company's services. An attendee wouldn't need to use our firm to benefit from the information we are going to share. In fact, the strategy is to provide the guests with tools they can use themselves to improve their lives without our assistance. This may sound a little backwards, but our business model is to help everybody in a group setting which leads to certain types of client who wants to improve their family's financial life in specific ways. This first installment is a practice run. I formally and digitally invite you and yours to attend and to provide honest feedback as we continue to develop this presentation and our firm. Here's the deal:


The Plan

The Bible’s Plan for
Getting out of debt & building wealth.
11 For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. – Jeremiah 29:11 (NIV)

Presented by

The Positive Vibes Financial Team
 
Presenter:
Seko “DJ Seko” Varner, WFG
Presenting his finds of sound financial steps in scripture.
Lean more about Seko by visiting his blog:

FREE

Thursday February 28, 2013
7:00 pm – 8:15 pm

The Fellowship Hall
Of Christian Church Uniting

6049 Indian River Road
Virginia Beach, VA 23464

Questions ? Call 757-248-3820
positivevibesfinancial @ gmail (dawt) com

We hope to see you there !

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Seko Varner is from Positive Vibes Financial, a World Financial Group team of financial services agents. They specialize in debt reduction, investments, and insurances. Seko is also in high demand as a special events DJ and owns an event marketing service. Seko has diverse background in business, real estate, counseling and education. Seko is active with numerous Youth Mentorship programs and has a background in radio and television. Visit www.HappilyEverAfter.Be or call 757-248-3820 for more details.

Sunday, February 17, 2013

The Plan is Coming.... Plan to be there !

I'm steppin' out with my team's first Financial Event !
I'm pretty excited........And I'm pretty concerned....... I want our events to truly be a source of guidance for as many as possible. I also want our events to further force my team to 'walk the talk'. So I have scheduled our first event to be a primarily invite-only event. If you are reading this, you are invited.
This event is called "The Plan........God's plan to get out of debt and to build wealth." This is actually the second presentation-styled event that I devised, but it's the event that we are leading with. While I'm not a theologian, I'm not evangelistic, and I don't exude that "Churchy" presence, I've recently become very interested in the scriptural guidance in regards to finances. In my first presentation, "Wealth strategies of the wealthy" I referenced the financial guidance that is found in the Torah, the Bible, the Koran, and in the writings associated with the Buddah. (I haven't gotten to researching the financial principles of traditional African, traditional Asian, and other indigenous religious cultures. That may be next.... I'll see. Any-who)....  After giving this presentation  (Wealth Strategies) twice for other groups I decided to do further focused study in the Judea-Christian texts................and voila..................The Plan.

This first installment is a practive run. I formally and digitally invite you and yours to attend and to provide honest feedback as we continue to develop this presentation and our firm. Here's the deal:


The Plan

The Bible’s Plan for
Getting out of debt & building wealth.
11 For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. – Jeremiah 29:11 (NIV)

Presented by

The Positive Vibes Financial Team
 
Presenter:
Seko “DJ Seko” Varner, WFG
Presenting his finds of sound financial steps in scripture.
Lean more about Seko by visiting his blog:

FREE

Thursday February 28, 2013
7:00 pm – 8:15 pm

The Fellowship Hall
Of Christian Church Uniting

6049 Indian River Road
Virginia Beach, VA 23464

Questions ? Call 757-248-3820
positivevibesfinancial @ gmail.com

I hope to see you there !

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Seko Varner is from Positive Vibes Financial, a World Financial Group team of financial services agents. They specialize in debt reduction, investments, and insurances. Seko is also in high demand as a special events DJ and owns an event marketing service. Seko has diverse background in business, real estate, counseling and education. Seko is active with numerous Youth Mentorship programs and has a background in radio and television. Visit www.HappilyEverAfter.Be or call 757-248-3820 for more details.

Monday, February 11, 2013

Considerations - I can't equals I don't enjoy...

Bob Marley has a lyrical that says something like 'Everybody wants Heaven, but no one wants to die.' Today I was listening to the Metaphysical discussions of KRS ONE and this thought came to me. My interpretation of the thought coming to me leans me to believe that this awakening came to me because I asked The Almighty a few days ago for guidance to better guide a child who is struggling to achieve against life's gravity. Here's that thought:

When one says "I can't" they a frequently saying "I don't enjoy the act of." I told a friend a while ago that I can't watch movies over and over again as it bores me. The more enlightened understanding is I don't enjoy the re-watching because the element of surprise is missing. I enjoy the elements of surprise. I have a counseling client that frequently says "I can't sit and listen to that boring teacher." The more enlightened understanding (looking deeper) leans toward an understanding that the client doesn't enjoy the event.

I am now moving towards guiding that client to add an enjoyable activity and pairing it with that boring teacher's lecture. Possibly drawing, writing lyrics, whatever.... I'm going to now take time to listen to myself when I say "I can't." If you decide to join me in your personal "I can't" consideration experience. Leave me message. Let's grow together.

The KRS ONE video clip is here:  http://youtu.be/71yG030XZME  
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Seko Varner is from Positive Vibes Financial, a World Financial Group team of financial services agents. They specialize in debt reduction, investments, and insurances. Seko is also in high demand as a special events DJ and owns an event marketing service. Seko has diverse background in business, real estate, counseling and education. Seko is active with numerous Youth Mentorship programs and has a background in radio and television. Visit www.HappilyEverAfter.Be or call 757-248-3820 for more details.

Wednesday, February 6, 2013

The 2008 Black History Class (27 days worth)

Blessings,

      Black History Month is an American invention that has moved the world towards improvement. ! 

     In 2008 Larry Brayboy and I finished and launched a online Black History Class for a group called The Imani Foundation that I was a former President of. This class was a fun project and most of the class is still functional. 

     The heading to the class has a quote that still has a level of direction for me: "The Imani Foundation's online Black History Class: Take the pre-test. Study one lesson per day. Take the post test. Pray. Let the information help you to become the change you want to see in the world."

Happy February !
Seko

Black History Class Begins !

"All strong peoples emphasize their history all the time; weak peoples do not." - Runoko Rashidi
Watch, listen, & learn. Click the links below for the daily lesson: Lesson 01 - The Pre-test
Lesson 02 - The history of Black History
Lesson 03 - The Global African Presence
Lesson 04 - Ancient African Migrations
Lesson 05 - African Slavery and Islam
Lesson 06 - The world has African ancestors
Lesson 07 - Biblical Black History # 1 - Return to Glory
Lesson 08 - Blacks in America before the Pilgrims
Lesson 09 - The American Slave Trade (Ma'afa)
Lesson 10 - Black Cowboys
Lesson 11 - Queen Mother Moore
Lesson 12 - America's first Black Millionaire
Lesson 13 - Black History and The Moors # 1
Lesson 14 - Biblical Black History # 2 - Black to the Bible
Lesson 15 - Black History in the Holy Koran
Lesson 16 - The Afro-Latinos
Lesson 17 - The Afro-Latinos #2: Puerto Rico
Lesson 18 - The Afro-Latinos #3: Mexico
Lesson 19 - Black Indians (American Indians)
Lesson 20 - The Black Jews
Lesson 21 - Biblical Black History # 3 - African influences
Lesson 22 - American Songs of Freedom
Lesson 23 - Black American Inventions
Lesson 24 - Salsa Music's Black History
Lesson 25 - African Martial Arts
Lesson 26 - Black History and the Blues
Lesson 27 - The Post Test

Created by Seko VArner and Larry Brayboy

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Seko Varner is from Positive Vibes Financial, a World Financial Group team of financial services agents. They specialize in debt reduction, investments, and insurances. Seko is also in high demand as a special events DJ and owns an event marketing service. Seko has diverse background in business, real estate, counseling and education. Seko is active with numerous Youth Mentorship programs and has a background in radio and television. Visit www.HappilyEverAfter.Be or call 757-248-3820 for more details.

Thursday, January 31, 2013

Dumping Credit Card Debt Forever

Peace & Prosperity,
     I had numerous recent conversations regarding credit card and other debts. I help folkout out debt on the daily. While I pray and pour libation for your financial-FREEdom I submit this for your consideration. Here's the road to FREEdom. Let me start Biblically.... Romans 13:8

"Owe no man any thing, but to love one another: for he that loveth another hath fulfilled the law." - KJV
"Let no debt remain outstanding, except the continuing debt to love one another, for he who loves his fellowman has fulfilled the law." - NIV

     If you are one who follows the Bible I invite you to consider that passage.........Cool..... Time up. I'm not pushing a certain translation or interpretation. However, it seems pretty clear that this particular passage warns Bible-followers to remain away from debt and to pay their debts. What's crazy to me is I've met and interacted with numerous self-described Bible-followers who aovid creditors calls, who have crazy amounts of debts, who have gone to court for collections, and who have had to move numerous times due to not paying their rent. One of the most difficult moves in acheiving financial FREEdom is dealing with debts. Here's one solution:

GET OUT OF DEBT !

My debt-destruction partner Dinh Nguyen and I provide a service that can reduce the amount and interest rate on debts. The ability to assist clients is fact dependant (It doesn't work for everyone - it depends on a few considerations) but when it works it works. To learn more about the process contact Dinh by calling 1-800-470-8155 ext. 141 and he will review the terms and see if it will be a good fix for you.

If your debts are greater than your income I would suggest considering our strategy and also considering the National Foundation for Credit Counseling (http://nfcc.org/) and requesting a Hardship DMP (Debt Management Plan) which may reduce your interest to 0%. Today I listened to a Clark Howard episode (01.24.13 - Here is the download link)  where he correctly advised the same. Currently my family is using the Debt Snowball approach,  as described by Dave Ramsey and my financial fav' Michelle Singletary, which sets one in a process of payiong off the smallest debts towards the largest debts to effectively 'Flee From Debt !" Whatever approach one uses, GET OUT OF DEBT. The good life awaits you ! Be blessed, stay blessed, be a blessing.

One last thing, If you know me personally.......Yes I do read and refer to the Bible. Don't be shocked ! I follow tried and true approaches.............. Hotep & Ashee !
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Seko Varner is from Positive Vibes Financial, a World Financial Group team of financial services agents. They specialize in debt reduction, investments, and insurances. Seko is also in high demand as a special events DJ and owns an event marketing service. Seko has diverse background in business, real estate, counseling and education. Seko is active with numerous Youth Mentorship programs and has a background in radio and television. Visit www.HappilyEverAfter.Be or call 757-248-3820 for more details.

Sunday, January 27, 2013

Sunday Schooled - I smile, you smile

I smile, you smile.

(Photo - Sam Varner graduates from Princeton University)
Dad's family wished him well as he discussed going to college. His mother and father both had third grade educations. His grandparents had less formal education. He used to tell me "I was never the smart child, I was only the one that was able to self motivate himself." In truth my father's siblings all did well. My grandfather, My father's Father had three families with three wives, He buried the first two wives and my grandmother buried my grandfather. My Grandfather had over 28 children and took care of all of them. My Father grew up calling many of his brothers and sisters aunt and uncle. These brothers and sisters were from my Grandfather's previous marriages. When my Grandfather married my Grandfather was in his late 60's and early 70s and my grandmother, formerly my grandfather's housekeeper, was in her 20s....... Back to the story..... 

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'Sunday Schooled' is a collection of blog posts from Seko Varner's former blogs. This post was dated 12/05/2007 while Seko's father, Rev. Dr. Samuel Varner was alive.
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(Photo Will Varner & Sam Varner Circa 1950ish)
The family went from plush to poor as the Whites in his neighborhood tricked his father out of land that he acquired. At one time my grandfather owned the first T-Model Ford vehicle in Opelika, Alabama and had acres of land. After the devils finished with him, he was extremely poor. Dad grew up with no running water, eating every two days at times, and in a home/shack that may seem third-world'ish in today's American standards. I remember the day he received his Doctorate degree from Princeton. He smiled widely for hours. His teeth became dry, he was so proud.

He ensured that my siblings and I had an easier life. He ensured that he was a better husband than his father was. He ensured that he would be able to provide us with an education after formal school since his father wasn't able to provide him with that opportunity. Dad made sure that he was the man that his father trained him to be and the man that his father wanted to be. Dad often told me that a dwarf standing on the arms of a giant can see farther and go farther than the giant. As I talk to Dad about the necessity of having more than an educational opportunity for my kids he simply smiles. I realized today that the smile he gives during those talk is the same as when he graduated. His graduation graduated our family, my new insight provides our family's new insight. I shine you shine. I pray now that I can experience that smile for many more years. After his last surgery his appetite has decreased. Dad now can go days without feeling hungry. I now enjoy every meal with him in a different light. Just watching him eat makes me smile.

It's funny......When I smile my son looks at me and smiles without knowing why. I guess I have a dwarf on my shoulders now. I smile, he smiles.
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Seko Varner is from Positive Vibes Financial, a World Financial Group team of financial services agents. They specialize in debt reduction, investments, and insurances. Seko is also in high demand as a special events DJ and owns an event marketing service. Seko has diverse background in business, real estate, counseling and education. Seko is active with numerous Youth Mentorship programs and has a background in radio and television. Visit www.HappilyEverAfter.Be or call 757-248-3820 for more details.