"To name ourselves, define ourselves, speak for ourselves...."
I grew up with this principle and transliteration being my favorite. As a youth involved in early Hip-Hop culture it was important to name yourself and to define yourself. I had various names and definitions from The Stingray, Shy-Ben, D.J. Mastermind, and The Graffiti Ratt ! During the same time I spent great amounts of time in various church choirs, bands, and youth activities. In each of these venues I was able to display and explore various aspects of what I became to understand was my growing-totality. I also was guided into understanding what I wasn't as well as what I was. Even as all of my nearly 95% white neighbors in Columbus, Ohio moved out of the area as soon as my family moved onto the court. I saw "For Sale" signs going up while we were still unpacking the moving van from New York Those moving neighbors called me all types of names and attempted to define me in many ways. One of the things which saved me, in addition to watching the paradoxical events of some of those neighbors seeking out my Father's advice and guidance on religious and addiction matters they were struggling with, was the principle of Kujichagalia. I was later able to hang-out with peers who were involved in very negative behaviors and overcome the peer-pressure because I refused to accept their assumptions and definitions for me although I didn't refuse their friendship. On numerous occasions my friends would warn me when they were going to engage in something that didn't fit in my definition of myself or my activities. After they warned, I simply left the scene and found something else to do. Since our family lived the principles of our seven candles daily along with our Christian values, leaving my peers and publicly sharing my reasons for leaving them during those moments provided me with valuable leadership skills.
A few years ago I decided that I wanted to change the experience of my family. My parents believed that if one received a good education, everything else will fall in place. While my parents, and those in their time made great strides to transform America into the America that I'm enjoying, this approach has left some of the crusaders of those times in poverty, depending on social security, or just making it. While most of family's elders seemed to be doing well I began noting as I grew older a deep seated concern on their finances. Many were living too long, and were outliving their retirement plans or outspending their pensions. While all of my father's siblings seemed to be doing well, few were in a position to "employ themselves and employ others", which is a sure sign of empowerment. After much research I found the writings and books of Dave Ramsey, Clark Howard, and my beloved Michelle Singletary. Soon I began a process to rid myself from any forms of debt, and then the Wifey-Fo-Lifey joined me as we moved towards a total money makeover. We're still in the process and not enjoying the process, but we are reaping the benefits of the process. We are winning. Our household mantras went from "No New Debt" to "Destroy all past debts". Although we have a 30 year loan on our house, following the strategies from the aforementioned gurus, and using other strategies I learned after I joined World Financial Group and became a financial services professional, we will save hundreds of thousands using these approaches versus following the normal dictates of the mortgage.
We should be able to pay for our children's college costs easily out of our pockets, and we have multiple strategies which will safely yet bountifully fund our retirement years. This year we were able to go over budget on our Christmas gift spending without using a dime of credit, and our budget overage will not affect our operational budget. As Dave Ramsey states "Live like no one else, and later you can live like no one else." In this upcoming New Roman Calendar Year, I pray that you may begin living like no one else. Debt is the new Slavery.............. And we ain't going back ! I pray that you leave the credit-devil alone. I pray that you stop believing the lie that a person needs credit to get ahead. Define yourself as wealth and act in that manner. Wealth invests it's resources, honors it's commitments, and then spends on the non-essentials. As KRS-ONE states "Visualize wealth, and put yourself in the picture." Habari-Gani ? Kujichagalia !!!!! Light that 1st green candle son.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Seko Varner is from Positive Vibes Financial,
a World Financial Group team of financial services agents. They
specialize in debt reduction, investments, and insurances. Seko is in
high demand as a special events DJ and owns an event marketing service.
Seko has diverse background in real estate, personal finance, business,
counseling and education. Seko is active with numerous Youth Mentorship
programs and has a background in radio and television. Visit
www.HappilyEverAfter.Be or call 757-248-3820 for more details.
Insights, Lessons-learned, Guidance, Idea-sharing, guest posts, and thoughts on FREEdome (freedom), Improvement, Family, and Fun presented by Seko Varner and special guests.
Thursday, December 27, 2012
Wednesday, December 26, 2012
Umoja, Unity - We Are One in Splendor
We are one in splendor:
We stayed in the house today (12/26/2012). We watched BET's marathon of Alex Haley movies and explained aspects of America's history of Improvement with our children. In the midst of the marathon I smiled thinking how far my family has come based upon the stories my grandmothers told me of our history. I also grimaced, considering the difficult Christmas time my family has had this year. On New Years Eve I consoled a tearful and shaking woman who wondered aloud "I fought to stay alive for this ? I didn't stay alive for this life." Her words were like a cold drink on a bad tooth. I struggled to remain calm and whisper "I glad... We're glad that you decided to fight. We're glad you're alive Mom." Mom then shared her despair that the family seemed dis-jointed and her fears that wounds would never heal. "I just want us to be ONE." Forcing a smile I struggled to say "We Are One. We will remain one." I then prayed to the Almighty for Oneship' followed by talking in-my-mind to the memory of my Father and Mother-In-Law. "Dad, Mom (Mother-in-law) - a familiar presence is needed." I needed a sign.
The next morning I awoke and prayed "Yeshua (Jesus), As your followers celebrate your birth, allow my family to feel your splendor." Later that afternoon my revered Sister (Sister-in-law) became engaged. Later that afternoon the wounds that afflicted my family began healing. Later that afternoon I delivered a Christmas plate from a family get-together to my Mum who was finally sleeping soundly. It is truly beautiful and splendid for brethren to dwell together in Unity. I awoke this morning to a day that we dedicate to Building and Maintaining Unity in the family, community, nation and race. Habari Gani ? - Umoja (Unity). We are one in splendor.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
From December 26th, 2007:
http://daddyvarner.blogspot.com/2007/12/we-are-one.html
We are one.... Today we had a PJday. We remained in the home and the kids and the Wifey never left their pajamas. I left the home only to turn in some paperwork at one of my side hustles, and also to buy some food from Choice Pizza & Subs in Virginia Beach. We stayed in the whole day and played, watched t.v., ate together, and had family time. During dinner I turned off the television and picked up a newspaper article that asked the question "What do you know about Kwanzaa ?"
I've been celebrating Kwanzaa for over 30 years. While in Columbus, Ohio my pops/mum sponsored Dr. Karenga (The main creator of the American Kwanzaa celebration) and his equally radical wife to stay with us as he did a three day cultural event for my pops' church Advent United Church of Christ. My Father (aided by my Mum) built this church from a few follks in my parent's living room. We had been celebrating our Kwanzaa for about seven years when Karenga came. He was a bit much for me then, as I really wanted just to fit in and Columbus Ohio in the 1980's was still a little scared of Kwanzaa. Each day during Kwanzaa in the 80's a group of Afrika-loving folk would gather together in homes, community centers, churches and in parks (t'was really cold in the parks) and revel in our ancestral love. (Circa 1977 - 1986) I loved these celebrations as people got together and pot-lucked, listened to story tellers, danced to African Drums from Tony West and The Imani Dancers, partied with a D.J. who threw-down, and the ladies were so hot !
Today will be my children's 7th and 6th Kwanzaa respectively. Kwanzaa is just something our family does, my parents have a well attended family Kwanzaa celebration every year and my daughter previously danced with a group (http://www.suwabiafricanballet.com/) named Suwabi Afrikan Ballet. I have also coordinated a long standing Kwanzaa celebration for the Imani Foundation (http://www.imanifoundation.com/) for about nine yars (tomorrow will be the 19th annual event for Imani Foundation which is 12 years old...we were members of Uhuruu African American Cultural for seven years and ran our program under that moniker). This year I declined to coordinate the event, and I will resign my position as the President of The Imani Foundation on 12/27/2008.
Normally on 12/26 we are at somebodies public event. This year we stayed home, as Kwanzaa should stay at home, as it was intended. Karenga and the U.S. organization (Karenga did develop the celebration with other people) designed public Kwanzaa events as events to teach non-practitioners how to celebrate Kwanzaa. At the close of tonight's dinner I asked my kids (to innitiate our Kwanzaa celebration) "What do you know about Kwanzaa ?" My daughter stated "The Red is for STRUGGLE, the Black is for PEOPLE, the Green is for HOPE." That's not completely the descriptions that the U.S. organization provided, yet that is what I have chosen to teach my kids. I didn't diverge from the truth, I removed some terms that may separate us from our peers. My wife greeted them with "Habri Gani" and my son said "Que Paso" (a loose translation into soulful-spanish). Then he and my daughter both said Umoja. Umoja being the principle of today prompted the question "What is Unity ?" My Son-sun answered that Unity is everything being stuck together and becoming like one. He then explained how the entire world is connected by touching. He said "The chair is touching the floor that's touching the wall that's touching the piano, that's touching the wall that's touching the painting. Everything in the world is touching something and we are all connected. As I searched for the exception to his rule I couldn't find one on a non-sub-atomic level. We are all touching each other in some way. We are all touched and effected by tragedies, and we are all touched by the breath of life. We are all touched by STRUGGLES. We are all touched by other PEOPLE. We are all touched by seeing others operate in HOPE.
I don't celebrate Ramadan but I've been touched by the words and actions of the Honorable Minister Louis Farrakhan. I'm not Jewish, maybe I'm Hebrew (I'm sure some are not gonna' understand that), but I've been touched by my beloved friends of Temple Beth El who are Biblical Jews (Israelistes) as opposed to Rabbinical Jews. I'm constantly touched by Donnie D. who hosts "The Big Idea" on CNBC (One of my favorite shows and stations). As a child, every Chanukkah in New York (1968 - 1976) was spent with my parent's dear friends the Gluckmans (Rabbi Emeritus Donald N. Gluckman and family) who allowed me to get drunk on wine as a two year old at one of their celebrations when all the adults failed to notice that a little boy was drinking after everyone.
I'm a Conscious-Christian and I've been touched by Christian people and groups who terrorized my family/ancestors with "Accept Christ or die" and the Trail of Tears, and the Klu Klux Klan (yes, they were a Christian group) as well as being loved, touched by, and prayed for by Christian absolute strangers who saw a frown on my face as I struggled with something in life. I never could think of anything to debunk my son's theory. As I considered the origins of mankind I began singing a Frankie Beverly and Maze tune..... "We are one." My sons' simple observation was truly profound. We are one. May we remain one. May we exemplify oneness. One love yall'. Happy Ramadan, Happy Hanukkah, Merry Christmas, Happy Kwanzaa, Happy New Year. Whatever you celebrate, I celebrate you !
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Post script - I am well aware of Dr. Karenga's past and the environment that the Kwanzaa celebration was birthed into. The celebrants of Kwanzaa that I associate with view Karenga's past and movement towards Improvement as we view America's past and America's movement towards improvement. We also value that the last letter "A" in Kwanzaa is a tribute to "America" (The term Kwanza has one ending letter "A", the celebration Kwanzaa ends with "AA" which nods to Afro-America".) Also we embrace that Kwanzaa was a man-made creation similar to Mother's Day, Father's Day, Christmas, and all other Holy-Days and Holidays. Lastly we embrace that while Dr. Karenga and the U.S. Organization did not place the date to conflict with Christmas although in the 3rd century Christmas was changed from it's earlier various dates (notable January 6th as the Orthodox and Coptic Churches still celebrate Christmas on January 6th) as one of the many tactics the early church used to stamp out earlier religious and cultural celebrations that were on December 25th in order to force conversion to our beloved Christianity.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Seko Varner is from Positive Vibes Financial, a World Financial Group team of financial services agents. They specialize in debt reduction, investments, and insurances. Seko is in high demand as a special events DJ and owns an event marketing service. Seko has diverse background in real estate, personal finance, business, counseling and education. Seko is active with numerous Youth Mentorship programs and has a background in radio and television. Visit www.HappilyEverAfter.Be or call 757-248-3820 for more details.
We stayed in the house today (12/26/2012). We watched BET's marathon of Alex Haley movies and explained aspects of America's history of Improvement with our children. In the midst of the marathon I smiled thinking how far my family has come based upon the stories my grandmothers told me of our history. I also grimaced, considering the difficult Christmas time my family has had this year. On New Years Eve I consoled a tearful and shaking woman who wondered aloud "I fought to stay alive for this ? I didn't stay alive for this life." Her words were like a cold drink on a bad tooth. I struggled to remain calm and whisper "I glad... We're glad that you decided to fight. We're glad you're alive Mom." Mom then shared her despair that the family seemed dis-jointed and her fears that wounds would never heal. "I just want us to be ONE." Forcing a smile I struggled to say "We Are One. We will remain one." I then prayed to the Almighty for Oneship' followed by talking in-my-mind to the memory of my Father and Mother-In-Law. "Dad, Mom (Mother-in-law) - a familiar presence is needed." I needed a sign.
The next morning I awoke and prayed "Yeshua (Jesus), As your followers celebrate your birth, allow my family to feel your splendor." Later that afternoon my revered Sister (Sister-in-law) became engaged. Later that afternoon the wounds that afflicted my family began healing. Later that afternoon I delivered a Christmas plate from a family get-together to my Mum who was finally sleeping soundly. It is truly beautiful and splendid for brethren to dwell together in Unity. I awoke this morning to a day that we dedicate to Building and Maintaining Unity in the family, community, nation and race. Habari Gani ? - Umoja (Unity). We are one in splendor.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
From December 26th, 2007:
http://daddyvarner.blogspot.com/2007/12/we-are-one.html
We are one.... Today we had a PJday. We remained in the home and the kids and the Wifey never left their pajamas. I left the home only to turn in some paperwork at one of my side hustles, and also to buy some food from Choice Pizza & Subs in Virginia Beach. We stayed in the whole day and played, watched t.v., ate together, and had family time. During dinner I turned off the television and picked up a newspaper article that asked the question "What do you know about Kwanzaa ?"
I've been celebrating Kwanzaa for over 30 years. While in Columbus, Ohio my pops/mum sponsored Dr. Karenga (The main creator of the American Kwanzaa celebration) and his equally radical wife to stay with us as he did a three day cultural event for my pops' church Advent United Church of Christ. My Father (aided by my Mum) built this church from a few follks in my parent's living room. We had been celebrating our Kwanzaa for about seven years when Karenga came. He was a bit much for me then, as I really wanted just to fit in and Columbus Ohio in the 1980's was still a little scared of Kwanzaa. Each day during Kwanzaa in the 80's a group of Afrika-loving folk would gather together in homes, community centers, churches and in parks (t'was really cold in the parks) and revel in our ancestral love. (Circa 1977 - 1986) I loved these celebrations as people got together and pot-lucked, listened to story tellers, danced to African Drums from Tony West and The Imani Dancers, partied with a D.J. who threw-down, and the ladies were so hot !
Today will be my children's 7th and 6th Kwanzaa respectively. Kwanzaa is just something our family does, my parents have a well attended family Kwanzaa celebration every year and my daughter previously danced with a group (http://www.suwabiafricanballet.com/) named Suwabi Afrikan Ballet. I have also coordinated a long standing Kwanzaa celebration for the Imani Foundation (http://www.imanifoundation.com/) for about nine yars (tomorrow will be the 19th annual event for Imani Foundation which is 12 years old...we were members of Uhuruu African American Cultural for seven years and ran our program under that moniker). This year I declined to coordinate the event, and I will resign my position as the President of The Imani Foundation on 12/27/2008.
Normally on 12/26 we are at somebodies public event. This year we stayed home, as Kwanzaa should stay at home, as it was intended. Karenga and the U.S. organization (Karenga did develop the celebration with other people) designed public Kwanzaa events as events to teach non-practitioners how to celebrate Kwanzaa. At the close of tonight's dinner I asked my kids (to innitiate our Kwanzaa celebration) "What do you know about Kwanzaa ?" My daughter stated "The Red is for STRUGGLE, the Black is for PEOPLE, the Green is for HOPE." That's not completely the descriptions that the U.S. organization provided, yet that is what I have chosen to teach my kids. I didn't diverge from the truth, I removed some terms that may separate us from our peers. My wife greeted them with "Habri Gani" and my son said "Que Paso" (a loose translation into soulful-spanish). Then he and my daughter both said Umoja. Umoja being the principle of today prompted the question "What is Unity ?" My Son-sun answered that Unity is everything being stuck together and becoming like one. He then explained how the entire world is connected by touching. He said "The chair is touching the floor that's touching the wall that's touching the piano, that's touching the wall that's touching the painting. Everything in the world is touching something and we are all connected. As I searched for the exception to his rule I couldn't find one on a non-sub-atomic level. We are all touching each other in some way. We are all touched and effected by tragedies, and we are all touched by the breath of life. We are all touched by STRUGGLES. We are all touched by other PEOPLE. We are all touched by seeing others operate in HOPE.
I don't celebrate Ramadan but I've been touched by the words and actions of the Honorable Minister Louis Farrakhan. I'm not Jewish, maybe I'm Hebrew (I'm sure some are not gonna' understand that), but I've been touched by my beloved friends of Temple Beth El who are Biblical Jews (Israelistes) as opposed to Rabbinical Jews. I'm constantly touched by Donnie D. who hosts "The Big Idea" on CNBC (One of my favorite shows and stations). As a child, every Chanukkah in New York (1968 - 1976) was spent with my parent's dear friends the Gluckmans (Rabbi Emeritus Donald N. Gluckman and family) who allowed me to get drunk on wine as a two year old at one of their celebrations when all the adults failed to notice that a little boy was drinking after everyone.
I'm a Conscious-Christian and I've been touched by Christian people and groups who terrorized my family/ancestors with "Accept Christ or die" and the Trail of Tears, and the Klu Klux Klan (yes, they were a Christian group) as well as being loved, touched by, and prayed for by Christian absolute strangers who saw a frown on my face as I struggled with something in life. I never could think of anything to debunk my son's theory. As I considered the origins of mankind I began singing a Frankie Beverly and Maze tune..... "We are one." My sons' simple observation was truly profound. We are one. May we remain one. May we exemplify oneness. One love yall'. Happy Ramadan, Happy Hanukkah, Merry Christmas, Happy Kwanzaa, Happy New Year. Whatever you celebrate, I celebrate you !
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Post script - I am well aware of Dr. Karenga's past and the environment that the Kwanzaa celebration was birthed into. The celebrants of Kwanzaa that I associate with view Karenga's past and movement towards Improvement as we view America's past and America's movement towards improvement. We also value that the last letter "A" in Kwanzaa is a tribute to "America" (The term Kwanza has one ending letter "A", the celebration Kwanzaa ends with "AA" which nods to Afro-America".) Also we embrace that Kwanzaa was a man-made creation similar to Mother's Day, Father's Day, Christmas, and all other Holy-Days and Holidays. Lastly we embrace that while Dr. Karenga and the U.S. Organization did not place the date to conflict with Christmas although in the 3rd century Christmas was changed from it's earlier various dates (notable January 6th as the Orthodox and Coptic Churches still celebrate Christmas on January 6th) as one of the many tactics the early church used to stamp out earlier religious and cultural celebrations that were on December 25th in order to force conversion to our beloved Christianity.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Seko Varner is from Positive Vibes Financial, a World Financial Group team of financial services agents. They specialize in debt reduction, investments, and insurances. Seko is in high demand as a special events DJ and owns an event marketing service. Seko has diverse background in real estate, personal finance, business, counseling and education. Seko is active with numerous Youth Mentorship programs and has a background in radio and television. Visit www.HappilyEverAfter.Be or call 757-248-3820 for more details.
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